The Art Of Not Losing Your Temper During An Argument: 5 Tips To Get There

So that an argument does not get us out of our hinges, it is important to know each other well and ” being able to control our emotions.

We have all to varying degrees remembered an argument in which we lost control, where emotions took hold and where we were unable to make our arguments in an effective and constructive manner.

Later, we evoke these arguments as a situation that escaped us or as a challenge in the face of which we have not been able to apply the adequate strategies. And this is not surprising, because knowing how to argue, when necessary, is not an easy task.

Unfortunately, at times in our personal or professional life, there is no other way out than to start this complex dialogue where reproaches, confrontations and small tensions abound.

“It is impossible to refute the ignorant in a debate,” said the philosopher Immanuel Kant. It is therefore necessary to know how to do it well, with intelligence and moderation, without losing one’s calm. Most importantly, it is important to be patient, to avoid distractions and to express your ideas clearly.

Below we suggest you apply these 5 strategies through which you will be able to control your emotions as much as possible. So read on!

5 keys to staying calm during an argument

1. Get to know the person in front of you, but above all, know yourself.

Knowing others is knowing, but knowing yourself is enlightenment. But why is it necessary to know yourself to debate effectively?

• In order not to lose our calm we must work on our internal strength, our security and our self-esteem.
• Self-knowledge prevents us from feeling affected when the other denigrates us. If we know what our qualities are, destructive comments will not reach us.

Knowing and knowing how to connect with ourselves and with the person in front of us, allows us to have more control over the situation.

2. In any argument, turn off your negative emotions.

If you want to stay calm in an argument you must learn to control your negative emotions. Rage, pride, spite, anger, nervousness… These are dimensions that put us on the defensive and the “claws” out.

There comes a time when we are in “attack mode”, and it is in this way that we lose control, that we stop arguing in a logical way to move only towards reproaches and dialogues. rigid where nothing is achieved.

To take charge of this situation, do this:

• Visualize yourself from the outside. You watch an argument from the outside, like a spectator, in peace and quiet.
• The exercise is to make sure that nothing hurts us, to identify this space where we are at peace with ourselves.
• Now think of an argument that could allow this situation to end well.

3. Don’t dispute immediately, give yourself time

In disputes where nothing is achieved, the interlocutors do not listen to each other, questions are imposed on the answers and in a short time poisoned comments, non-constructive criticism and sentences appear. will regret later.

How is this type of behavior useful to us? Apparently nothing. So, and to give shape to a productive debate in which we can always remain calm, it is strongly recommended that we take our time to respond. As there is no rush, it would be interesting to apply the following tips:

• listen carefully to what the other person is telling you and analyze it
• recognize the effects of the message on us by sensing our emotions and feelings
• it’s time to think about an answer
• despite the tension, it is important to give a calm answer that does not reinforce the tension

However, if we see that this dispute is getting us nowhere and only serves to make use of blame and negative emotions, resolve it. Remember that there are arguments that are not worth the trouble.

4. Breathe deeply

When we are alert, when we maintain a debate, our brain almost interprets it as a threat. It is then that a whole series of reactions appear: palpitations, tremors, interrupted breathing, dry mouth, stomach pain …

It is at these times, and to stay calm in the midst of an argument, that there is nothing better than controlling our breathing.

For this it will be very useful for us to take a deep breath and to breathe out calmly. A more relaxed body reasons better.

5. Train Your Inner Calm: Prepare For Life’s Daily Challenges

Our daily life demands a lot of us: to debate effectively, to face frustration, criticism and mainly these little things in life.

Being prepared “from the inside” will help us to better face external challenges. This is why it will be very useful for you to practice certain activities such as meditation, a sport, or artistic exercises such as writing, painting, which will help us to cultivate our interior.

It is possible to train to achieve inner peace through experiences which, in a direct way, make us work on certain values ​​such as self-esteem.

By being relaxed and sure of oneself, it is possible to face difficulties with serenity, even those interminable arguments that exasperate us.

Will you use these tips to stay calm during an argument?

In short, there are several effective strategies to help us manage our emotions, give careful answers and, above all, stay calm.

Remember these tips for your next argument. We hope they will be useful to you and will guide you in the future.